F E E T
A A Love Story
by Dr. Susan Block
What is it about some people's feet that make other people wild with desire?
Feet are two of the most denigrated parts of the human body. We literally step on them all day. Rarely pleasured, often overworked, feet are the slaves, or packhorses, for the rest of our bodies.
Yet feet can command tremendous passion in some people. There are Leg Men, Breast Men, Bun Men, and there are Feet Men (or maybe it's Foot Men). But unlike breasts, legs and buns, the charms of feet are rarely examined, except by podiatrists, pedicurists, foot fetishists, and shoe salesmen.
Though my doctorate's in philosophy, not podiatry, I've studied the pleasures of feet for years. I love to explore love in all its many splendored aspects, and the foot is an aspect of love. After all, even if you're not "into" feet, if you love someone, you love them head-to-toe. So you don't have to be a certifiable foot fetishist to appreciate feet, or to enjoy having your feet appreciated.
first part of my body
Now that we're married, there isn't a part of me that he hasn't touched (well, I won't let him pick my nose). But during our courtship, I wanted to take it slow, so I wouldn't let him move his horny hands above my knee. But I did let him play with my feet, and oh, how he played with my feet! He caressed my ankles, massaged my arches, kissed my soles, sucked my toes, and made love to my feet. And my feet fell in love with him. And even now that we're married and having all kinds of sex, there's a very special relationship between Max and my feet. But before I get more personal, here are some foot fetish basics
According to our continuing research here at the Dr. Susan Block Institute for the Erotic Arts & Sciences, it's mostly males who are aroused by female feet. Of course, gay foot fetishists like men's feet, and some lesbians are turned on by women's feet.
Though straight women can be into men's feet (and many enjoy pleasuring their male partners' feet at our legendary Foot Fetish Salons here at the Institute), not very many are, at least not to the fetishistic extent that so many guys lust after ladies' feet.
Preferences for foot types vary. Some like dirty feet, though most prefer clean. Some crave big athletic feet, others go for small and dainty. Some like tan feet or polished toe nails, high heels, leather boots, sandals, stockings, toe cleavage or toe rings.
Some adore massaging, pampering and pedicuring feet. Others want to be walked on. There are foot-lickers, toe-suckers, heel-sniffers, arch-ticklers and Imelda Marcos types just into shoes. Some go for stockings, often relishing the aroma of just-worn nylons.
Some couples do 69, but instead of having oral sex, they suck each other's toes. Some guys love to masturbate against a woman's foot, or use her big toe like a butt plug. Others are into foot bondage; they like to tie feet up and torture or tickle them. Foot-ticklers derive sadistic yet playful pleasure from tickling a victim's feet until he or she is gasping for breath or screaming with helpless laughter. A more mild, sensuous form of foot-tickling may be done with a feather.
Still others, "crush" or "squish" fetishists, like to watch women step in things, or on things like grapes, jello, dolls, bugs, eggs. Their ultimate fantasy is to be mashed under a giantess's foot, but since that--if it were possible--would be terminal, they satisfy their lust by voyeuristically watching ladies' feet wreaking destruction on other crushable items.
makes a foot lover
If you'd almost always rather have sex with your lover's feet than any other body parts, or if you must focus on your partner's feet to reach orgasm, or if you'd usually rather screw a shoe than a person, you're a foot fetishist (the technical term is podophiliac). If your sexuality doesn't revolve your feelings about feet, you're more what I'd call a foot lover, a foot appreciator, or maybe you just playing footsie.
In the classic sense, a "fetishist" invests god-like magical powers into the fetish object. The true foot fetishist objectifies, glorifies and downright deifies the foot, or shoe, or the foot in the shoe, with or without the stocking, being licked, caressed, massaged, worshipped, tickled, bedecked in jewels or stepping on something squishy.
do foot lovers
For as many different reasons as there are different foot lovers. But typically, fetishes begin in early childhood. As a toddler toddles and crawls, exploring the world, feet are often the first part of Mommy that he encounters. Children who are not picked up and held much, whose main physical contact with Mom is with her feet, are said to be more likely to develop foot fetishes, though this is by no means a hard and fast rule.
Intense childhood experiences with the feet of other relatives, like older sisters or cousins, as well as friends and, most notoriously, babysitters, may also lead one to become a foot lover. Beware the babysitter with the pretty pedicured toes, strappy sandals and an attitude; she may inspire your child to like feet! On second thought, what's so terrible if your kid likes feet? You could do worse. As long as he's capable of love (and if you hold him and give him affection, he'll probably be capable of love), what difference does it make if he's into feet or breasts, armpits or elbows?
But what about those foot fetishists so obsessed with feet that they truly can't get above the ankle, and love a whole human being?
One reason fetishists become "obsessed" is they feel that their interest in feet is wrong. Whenever we feel that something we crave sexually is shameful or wrong, it becomes ultra-exciting in a naughty way. But it also becomes frustrating and disturbing, as we can't integrate it into our everyday lives. Ultimately, it makes us feel bad about ourselves, sometimes even incapable of love. Most sex criminals have desires they feel ashamed of. Even if you've never done anything illegal, if you're deeply ashamed of your sexuality--whether you're a foot fetishist or just a garden variety sex maniac--your love life is bound to be troubled.
So many male foot fetishists are married to women with whom they never share their desire, ashamed to reveal their true feelings. And the real shame is that some of those wives would enjoy a foot rub or foot licking, if it's presented nicely. But their husbands view their own interest in feet as something perverted that they couldn't possibly share with someone they love.
If you have a foot fetish, I hope you can share it with someone you love. You probably shouldn't call it a "fetish;" that sounds kind of scary to most people. Just find creative and sensuous ways to integrate your favorite forms of foot play into your lovemaking.
What about shoes?
A fetish for shoes is also usually conditioned in early childhood or adolescence, just like the fetish for feet and most other things.. By the way, this is not limited to humans. A male chimpanzee raised in captivity developed a bit of a shoe fetish, masturbating obsessively by rubbing his caretaker's leather boot. Boot Time for Bonzo!
High heels are the most fetishized type of shoe. They began with Catherine de Medici, a 16th century Italian who married Henry II of France. The petite Catherine had shoes custom-designed to give her height, starting a high heel rage among the French. But those first Italian leather heels were quite difficult to maneuver in; male escorts had to carry high-heeled ladies up and down stairs. Heels still have a way of compelling a gentleman to be gallant.
Submissive men find the extremely spiked heel menacingly arousing, like a lethal feminine weapon. S/M magazines often show a woman's spike resting on the neck or genitals of a submissive male. Dominant men also tend to like high heels, in part because of the way they alter a woman's posture, creating a more dramatic curve of the spine that makes her butt and calves seem rounder, her thighs seem thinner, her breasts stick out, and gives her hips that Monroe sway when she walks. This precarious "wiggly walk" appeals to the traditional man's desire to protect a fragile woman, or maybe to pounce on her.
Many men and women are aroused by frailty. Politically incorrect as it may be, this is part of our prehistoric predatory attraction to the weak.
Many foot fanciers love sandals, combining the leather shoe with naked toes. The sandal fetish is as old as the Bible. "How beautiful are thy feet in sandals" is a line from the erotic lovers' dialogue in The Song of Songs, attributed to King Solomon who is said to have had 1000 wives. That's 2000 feet, 10,000 toes--wow, that must have been some bill from the palace pedicurist.
Chinese have had the longest,